An AWBW Text Adventure: Episode 1 -- The Village
Creator: BamboozleVI || First Published: 11/04/2015 || Players: 2 || Size: 15x15
Categories: Toy-Box
Rating: 8.71 in 7 ratings
For design map discussion or to get suggestions from other users, visit the AWBW Discord Chat!
Comments:
Bamboozle (11/04/2015 01:14am | Edited: 11/11/2015 05:16pm):
-->> DUNGEON MAP: http://awbw.amarriner.com/prevmaps.php?maps_id=67890

You find yourself surrounded by shadows in a town you've never seen before. In front of you is a bar, its door
swung wide open, a swath of toasty air radiating from its entrance. The air outside is chilly and somehow much
darker than you remember it. Your head hurts and your vision is exceptionally bad; normally you wear glasses,
but you seem to have lost them in whatever weird event brought you here. You have no recollection or idea of
what this place is; the architecture is different, the smells are different, the grass is different... regardless, you
figure you need to find out what the hell is going on over a nice glass of beer. You can make out the figures of
two men you don't know sitting at the counter, along with the bartender himself. Beyond that, your vision fails
you. You should find those glasses ASAP.

(This is a text adventure if the title wasn't enough to imply it. You give orders in the form of text to advance the
story, like "punch the bartender" or "go west" or whatever you want to do in the realm of logic. I reply in the
comments and change the map to reflect what happens. Like a little interactive game, but much cooler
because I'm the one operating it)
(Multiple people can reply, I'll make multiple infantries)
Bamboozle (11/04/2015 01:14am | Edited: 11/11/2015 04:57pm):
Character List + Inventories:

DullPheonix: OS INFANTRY
Condition: Healthy
A common shirt (e under chainmail shirt)
A chainmail shirt (e)
Pants (e)
Shoes (e)
A stupid-looking pair of reflector glasses (http://i.imgur.com/JRRcKzC.jpg) (e)

A wickedly spiked rusty iron mace

BountyFrog: GE INFANTRY
Condition: Healthy (slightly injured)
A common shirt (e under robes)
Pants (e under robes)
Shoes
A pair of flamboyantly ugly glasses (http://i.imgur.com/8qavwYQ.jpg) (e)
A set of dusty red robes (e)
A steel handaxe (e)
A pair of leather traveling boots (e)
A bag of dragon jerky
5 gc

Jackie Milton: YC INFANTRY
Condition: Injured -- blunt force trauma to the scalp, (healing)
A common shirt, torn (e)
Pants (x2) (e)
Shoes (e)
A fine steel spear (e)
A silver ring
A lockpick
A pair of weird cardboard glasses (http://i.imgur.com/9biupFV.jpg) (e)
A makeshift head bandage (e)
A large and sweaty pair of cotton pants
A pair of steel greaves
A floppy pink felt hat
17 gc

Xmo5: GS INFANTRY
Condition: Healthy
A common shirt (e)
Pants (e)
Shoes (e)
A dumb-looking vision-correcting visor (http://i.imgur.com/fzUmywD.jpg) (e)
An iron spear (e)
A rusted iron shield in terrible condition (e)
Three packs of rations

Just Look at My OPness: JS INFANTRY
Condition: Healthy, Soulless
A common shirt
Pants (e)
Shoes (e)
5 gc
A luxuriously engraved flintlock pistol with powder and rounds
A steel saber, sheathed
A jazz album by Death titled "Compilation Number Five"
A Death-brand t-shirt (e)
A helmet-visor combo (http://i.imgur.com/r5iFZ5a.jpg)
A carton of eggs
A strange flask of purple liquid

Dreadnought: TG INFANTRY
Condition: Healthy (poor vision)
A common shirt (e)
Pants (e)
Shoes (e)
A pair of pointy glasses (http://i.imgur.com/5TL4dZT.jpg) (e)
A reinforced wooden kiteshield
A composite bow and eight iron arrows (e)
5 gc
DullPheonix (11/04/2015 02:51am):
How do you buy a drink without anything to offer for barter or use as money?
BountyFrog (11/04/2015 03:08am):
I would go to the nearest guy and ask where the heck I am
Jackie Milton (11/04/2015 08:23am):
*takes ye flask

-J.D.M.
(The "D" stands for "Dennis")
Xmo5 (11/04/2015 11:57am | Edited: 11/04/2015 11:57am):
I walk up to the bar and take a seat nearby, but too close to, the other men at the bar.
Keeping my voice low enough that I feel the other men can't hear me, I casually convey to the
bartender that I'm a traveler and ask where I am.
BountyFrog (11/04/2015 01:33pm):
Well put xmo... I do that same thing lol
Just Look at My OPness (11/04/2015 02:30pm):
I crawl around looking for my glasses while I shed a tear.
Bamboozle (11/04/2015 07:45pm | Edited: 11/04/2015 07:51pm):
Ok this was a lot more players than I thought lel. Should've made a bigger map. I've
added a key to the character list so you can tell who is who. Also, forests represent your
lack of vision (until you get your glasses or do something to fix your crappy eyesight).

DullPheonix: You scrounge through your pockets and produce a few golden coins that
you've never seen before. The front face carries a set of strange inscriptions, the back
side bearing an unknown crown-like design. You figure it must be the currency of
whatever land you're in.

Jackie Milton: You head up confidently to the barcounter and grab a flask of frothy beer.
You're unsure whose it is, but judging by the looks you're getting from the bartender, it
definitely isn't meant for you. The men around you, who appear to be on that peculiar
line of intoxicated but not quite drunk, haven't seemed to notice you've taken one of
their drinks.

BountyFrog and Xmo5: The two of you walk up to the barcounter and deposit yourselves
into some nearby seats. You lower both your voices to gravelly whispers as you begin to
converse with the bartender at the exact same time, which creeps him out a bit.
Unfazed, he answers back.
"This is Bambo Village. We usually don't get travelers... actually, we don't get travelers at
all, ever since the... ahem... murders."
He goes silent for a bit, wiping some glasses.
"But I'm sure you'll be fine. Can I get you anything?"
You feel some vague weight in your pockets; you notice that you've been carrying
around a few strange gold coins. Foreign coins for adventures in a foreign land. How
fitting.

Just Look at My OPness: You stumble to the ground in an intentional stupor as you mull
about for your glasses. After finding out they're not here (at least, not where you're
looking), you begin to break down in tears which catches the attention of a shady man
dressed in dark garb standing in a corner. He slowly approaches you, extending a hand
outwards to lift you to your feet. You stare at the gloved hand in contemplation,
wondering if you should accept the strange man's help or not.
DullPheonix (11/04/2015 08:12pm):
Well, so much for being a smart-ass. One more game inquiry though: can we interact with
each other or are we in observable but separate dimensional instances of the same scenario?

* head inside, ask for a glass of water

Bamboozle (11/04/2015 08:45pm):
You're all in the same place together, which is why I should've made a bigger map to let
folks wander around as they please. But yeah, you can interact with each other in the
realm of logic.
Xmo5 (11/04/2015 08:47pm | Edited: 11/04/2015 08:56pm):
YES! So pleased with the GS infantry for me :)

I vote for observable but separate dimensional instances of the same scenario with the
exception of comic relief on Bamboozle's part... but he's the dungeon master here, so I'll
defer to him.

Ahem...

Ignoring his comment about the murders, I make a smooth, and completely normal segue after
ordering a shirley temple: "Those glasses you're cleaning remind me: I seem to have
misplaced my glasses. You don't happen to see where I might have dropped them, do you?"

EDIT: Yeah, I just put this in Toy Box too, by the way. It deserves the attention!
Jackie Milton (11/04/2015 09:12pm):
*Drinks all of ye flask in one gulp. Slams glass down and walks over to Just Look at my
OPness.
*Pushes him back on the ground
Just Look at My OPness (11/04/2015 09:30pm):
I spit on Jackie and take the hand of the shady man.
Bamboozle (11/05/2015 01:19am):
I'll try to post every day or two to keep up interest so if I skip your turn, assume you're just standing there idly.

DullPheonix: You walk into the bar and politely ask the bartender for a glass of water.
The bar patrons, upon hearing your request, heartily chuckle to themselves at the
sight of a lightweight drinker. The bartender, with an unchanging expression, quickly
fills a glass and slides it over to you while conserving with some others who seem to
share your predicament.
You pay one gold coin and begin to drink the refreshing glass of H2O, feeling your
parched throat become suddenly lush with liquid. You notice a barfight going down in
the corner.

Xmo5: You mumble your order about a shirley temple. The bartender, showing a brief
moment of surprise, gets to work mixing up the ginger ale and grenadine.
"Haven't had that one ordered in a while."
After sliding the drink over to you, you feel the time is proper for asking where your
glasses possibly could've gone. He stops with a sullen expression.
"Ah, yeah, probably the work of our maintenance guy. He likes collecting people's
glasses in a inexplicably weird way. Sometimes he finds people passed out at the
doors of the bars, usually after a few too many shots. Takes their glasses. Has a
strange obsession with them. You can try finding him outside. Heard he was trying to
clean the place up for the Lady's visit."
You pay 2gc for the shirley temple and silently sip the beverage. Perhaps that
maintenance guy does have your glasses. Finding him is another matter entirely...

Jackie Milton: You raise the flask of beer to your mouth and part your lips wide to
prepare for the gush of alcoholic goodness about to course through your neck. You
miss a little bit, partially due to the weight of the flask, and the beer halfway crashes
onto your mouth and halfway crashes into your lower face, causing a stream of beer
to drip down your chin and soak your shirt. Whatever. Burping down what did get into
your mouth, you swagger over to Just Look at My OPness and violently push him
down onto the ground. He scowls at you and spits into your eye -- like, directly into
your eye. He had a good shot.
The guy whose beer you stole suddenly notices you just stole his beer and walks over
to you with a tipsy step, grabbing you by the collar. His bearded face is inches away
from yours. Through the haze of beer and spittle, you hear him say something to you.
"You got a fokkin' problem, mate?" Although you're basically blind from Just Look At
my OPness's spit, you can vaguely make out the shape of an empty beer mug in your
aggressor's hand, ready to be used as a weapon.
STATUS -- BLIND FOR ONE TURN, 50% DRUNK

Just Look at My OPness: Before you manage to take the shady man's hand, Jackie
Milton walks over and pushes you down onto the ground for no apparent reason.
Curdling the inside of your mouth to produce a perfect projectile of spit and saliva, you
launch it into his face with impeccable accuracy, leaving him blinded and dazed as
another bar resident attempts to pick a fight with him. You then take the shady man's
hand, admiring his strong grip and firm stance. When you go to lock eyes with him,
you have trouble due to the fact that he has no eyes. Or skin, or anything, for that
matter. You're looking into a skull. That presumably belongs to a skeleton.
"Allow me to introduce myself, kid. I'm Death. I'll help you find what you want and
more if you would just sell me a little something."
You inquire as to what the something is.
"Your soul. Now, it might seem like a drastic thing to get rid of, but you won't miss it,
man, I promise. I need it really bad, man. I got the shakes. Just need one soul. I'll give
you what you're looking for in return, man, just help me out here."
Xmo5 (11/05/2015 09:44am):
(I think I should still have 3 gc left over if the drink cost me 2, right? Or did I not
start with 5?)

I take advantage of the commotion near the front of the bar to get up and go talk to the
other man who was at the bar when I came in. I introduce myself (generally speaking- not
sure if I remember who I am) and make casual commentary about how the maintenance guy
around here must stay pretty busy keeping this place in working order- I try to get him
talking since his lips seem kind of loose in this state.
BountyFrog (11/05/2015 10:10am):
I decide that I do not like this bar, and personally find pretty creepy some of the people here, so I take
my chances and just leave the bar, to look for any types of clues that would tell me where, and even
possibly, when, I am.
Just Look at My OPness (11/05/2015 10:36am):
I say "Well um. Ok, but what's the 'more' part?"
Just Look at My OPness (11/05/2015 11:50am | Edited: 11/05/2015 11:51am):

DullPheonix (11/05/2015 05:49pm):
* overhear bartender talk about the glasses collector
* head outside
Jackie Milton (11/05/2015 07:38pm):
I duck and sweep kick the tosser
Bamboozle (11/06/2015 12:02am | Edited: 11/06/2015 01:14pm):
(I'm really bad at math)

Xmo5: Seeing the roughhousing going on in the corner, you decide to make some
casual conversation with the
last remaining original bar patron. He looks pretty down, but he does manage to start
talking rather openly due
to the effects of his drink. He mentions how the maintenance guy stops in every day or
so to make sure
everything is functioning correctly, and even says how he saw him not less than an hour
ago, apparently
working on some rusted air vent on the back outside wall of the store.

BountyFrog: You decide that this bar isn't your type of establishment and promptly
leave. Heading out into the
brisk air, with the cloudy sky radiating a general sense of gloom, you attempt to stare
outwards but are met
with a blurry haze. You really need your glasses if you want to continue any further
without tripping over
something and dying.
You hear several grunts and noises of human origin coming from the back outer side of
the bar. Hopefully if
you stay close to the wall you'll be able to easily navigate there.

Just Look at My OPness: You ask what exactly this Death fellow means by "more".
"Oh, man, all sorts of things. I have Death plushies, a Death clothing line, Death-scented
air fresheners, a few
Death albums... although I guess if you want more serious stuff, I could oblige you.
Whaddya want, a sword? A
nice knife for cutting up fools? A gun? Just drop the word, pal. But first, your soul."

DullPhoenix: You head outside for a breath of fresh air and the chance to stumble upon
this maintenance
dweeb you've been hearing about. Walking around to the back of the bar, you see a pot-
bellied tank-top
sporting dad-jean wearing man struggling to install a new pipe into some sort of rusted
mechanism, holding a
wrench in his hand and strenuously grasping the pipe with the other. You see a small
pouch protruding from
his belt, which seems to be holding a variety of spectacles.

Jackie Milton: Despite your spit-blindedness, you manage to duck the man's oncoming
attack and fling your
leg outwards to sweep him. You feel your foot hit his legs and you do indeed manage to
sweep him off his feet,
with the downside that you trip and land alongside him due to the lack of vision. The
two of you begin to
grapple one another, although in his drunken rage he seems much stronger.
BLINDNESS CLEARED UP
STATUS: 50% DRUNK
Xmo5 (11/06/2015 08:03am | Edited: 11/06/2015 09:37am):
I quickly finish my drink, politely excuse myself, and step outside for a "breath of fresh
air" and begin working my way to the back of the building, looking for the maintenance man.

EDIT: As I approach the door, I overhearing JLAMO's conversation with death, I casually
lean in and whisper in his ear "Psst, you might want to make sure the gun comes loaded."
Just Look at My OPness (11/06/2015 09:08am):
"Give me a nice handgun and a sword, and we have a deal. Maybe an album and a t-shirt too. ...And maybe you could sign the album?"
BountyFrog (11/06/2015 09:28am):
I try to stay close to the wall and navigate myself there safely
Dreadnought (11/06/2015 12:38pm | Edited: 11/06/2015 12:42pm):
Is it too late to join? I could have been sleeping in a corner or something.
BountyFrog (11/06/2015 12:52pm):
Lol
DullPheonix (11/06/2015 02:04pm):
Generally new players are introduced at session breaks during tabletop-ish games, but that
is always up to GM discretion.

* address the handyman politely, from afar
* ask him if he would be willing to sell a pair of spectacles as he has been spoken of in
good repute
Jackie Milton (11/06/2015 05:44pm):
I attempt to escape my grapple and crawl towards the dark man conversing with the one who
spat in my eye.
Bamboozle (11/06/2015 09:40pm):
Eh sure why not.

Dreadnought: You find yourself having recently awoken from an extended slumber (a nice way of saying
getting wasted) in the corner of a shady bar you don't quite remember. As you blink open your eyes, which
provide exceptionally blurry vision, you see several things occurring:
- a pair of people participating in a classic barfight
- a person conversing with a sad-looking man staring into his beer at the counter
- a strange hooded man in black garb talking to another person near the barfight
- a bartender concocting a foul-looking beverage
The door out of the bar is open, thankfully, where the warm air that smells so lovingly of alcohol and vomit
mixes in with the crisp wintery air of the outside.

Xmo5: You hastily gulp down the rest of your drink and mention something about getting a breath of fresh air.
You stop near Just Look at My OPness and whisper for him to ensure that the handgun comes loaded. He
seems to hear your advice.
Heading out into the slightly frosty evening air, you make your way to the back of the building as best you can
with your positively terrible vision. You spot a pouch on his utility belt, with a sack containing what looks like a
bunch of glasses. DullPhoenix heads up to talk to him. BountyFrog seems to be right next to you. The
maintenance guy seems a bit distressed at how many random strangers are walking over to him all of a
sudden.

Just Look at My OPness: You lay out the terms and conditions of your soul-selling. Death, quirked by your
request, grins and quickly shakes your hand.
"A deal is a deal! One... handgun, one sword, and I'll throw in an album and an official t-shirt for no charge!
Really, what else can your puny mortal form give m-- I mean, thanks for the cooperation, my friend!"
He sticks his hand down his... robes and shuffles about as if reaching for something. Somehow, with one hand,
he produces all four items out of nowhere. You gaze down to view them.
You receive:
- a luxuriously engraved flintlock pistol with powder and rounds
- a steel saber, sheathed
- a jazz album by Death titled "Compilation Number Five"
- a Death-brand t-shirt
Noticing your incredulous stare at the flintlock, he shrugs and grins some more.
"Hey, you said a handgun. A gun for usage of a single hand. Not a semi-auto or an auto or a revolving-
chamber mechanism... a handgun. Now, for my end of the bargain. Hold still. This may hurt."
Death raises his bony hand and you feel a type of dark magic trickle into you. You quickly turn immobile,
feeling a crushing weight of darkness permeate your very being, as if your innards are being torn inside out.
Your vision goes black and you feel your soul literally being ripped out of you. As your vision returns to normal,
with that gaping void somewhere where your soul used to be, you notice your vision issues have been cured.
"Heh! (sucker) I mean, congratulations! You're... um... an undead walking body that possesses no soul and
your eyes are black and your skin looks a bit sickly grey but think of the positives! You have that cool antique
gun, right?" He chuckles some more. "Anyways, time to smoke this newly-acquired soul!" He disappears into a
puff of mist, leading you standing there.
VISION CURED

BountyFrog: You make your way to the back of the building as best you can with your positively terrible vision.
You find yourself near one of the other new arrivals, facing a rather pudgy man in a tank top who appears to be
valiantly trying to install something into a pipe mechanism built into the wall. You spot a pouch on his utility
belt, with a sack containing what looks like a bunch of glasses. DullPhoenix heads up to talk to him. Xmo5
seems to be right next to you. The maintenance guy seems a bit distressed at how many random strangers are
walking over to him all of a sudden.

DullPhoenix: You calmly and politely issue a greeting to the maintenance guy, who stops his work and wipes
off a trickle of sweat as he faces your direction. He waves a little, albeit awkwardly, and you ask him about the
glasses and if he would be willing to part with a pair. He frowns, putting the wrench down, and says in a
strangely high-pitched and squacky voice that he's been building up this collection for a while and 10 gold
coins would be enough to compensate giving a pair away.

Jackie Milton: You kick and struggle your way out of the hold of your opponent, crawling on all fours towards
the darkly-geared man talking to Just Look at My OPness. However, your semi-drunken state makes you
awfully slow, and the man disappears in a puff of smoke before you get to him. With your hopes crushed, you
feel your opponent grab onto one of your ankles and pull you back into the fray. With a cry of "don't mess wit'
me ya arse", he grabs the empty beer mug on the floor that you previously drank out of and smashes it directly
into your scalp. You see nothing for a while but darkness as you clutch your head in shock, hearing the glass
fragments crunch beneath your shoes as you stagger about. You are well on your way to getting wasted, and
your opponent still seems like he wants to finish the fight.
INJURY -- BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA TO SCALP
50% DRUNK


Jackie Milton (11/06/2015 10:23pm):
*In a confused rage of drunkenness, head woundage, and knowing the mere fact that Death
never produced a jazz album in the history of its career, I attempt to expend all my
remaining energy turning my foe into a fine paste, no matter the consequences.
BountyFrog (11/06/2015 11:36pm):
Lol Jackie you sure seem to be having fun xD

While I noticed the janitor talking with DullPheonix and hearing how he wanted ten gold coins, then
remembering i only have 5, I decide to try and steal one from the pouch while his attention is directed
towards dull pheonix. However, if he happened to notice me I would gladly knock him unconscious
and then take the glasses.
Dreadnought (11/07/2015 03:53am):
I stumble over to the counter, trying not to trip over the fight, and make an inquiry to
the bartender about where I am.
Just Look at My OPness (11/07/2015 10:26am):
I gaze admiringly at the beautiful and historically accurate flintlock pistol (and kind of wish I'd been more specific) I
am holding as well as the saber. I unequip my shirt and equip my death-brand t-shirt as I walk toward to seat
myself at the bar.
DullPheonix (11/07/2015 12:09pm):
* attempt to barter the price lower
Jackie Milton (11/07/2015 04:04pm):
(Channeling Xmo5)

I politely introduce myself as well and mention that I too am interested in the glasses,
and I ask if he would let me have a pair on a loan, with the promise that I'll share any
treasure I find with him.
wetguy (11/07/2015 05:39pm | Edited: 11/07/2015 05:40pm):
Pussy cat, pussy cat
Where have you been?
I've been to London to Visit the Queen.

Pussy cat, pussy cat,
What did you do there?
I killed a stupid mouse under her chair.

Pussy cat, pussy cat
Where did you stay?
I stayed in a hotel at Oxford street.

Pussy cat, pussy cat
What did you eat?
I ate scrambled eggs with some cheese.

Pussy cat, pussy cat
Where did you go?
I went to the museum at Marylebone Road.

Pussy cat, pussy cat
What happened there?
Shocked to see a dead mouse give me a stare.

Pussy cat, pussy cat
What is your plan?
To live in Mayfair with a house and lawn

Pussy cat, pussy cat
How will you do that?
I am gonna marry YOU!
Jackie Milton (11/07/2015 07:24pm):
Man....
J.W.M.
(The "W" stands for "WTF...")
Bamboozle (11/08/2015 01:56am | Edited: 11/08/2015 02:06am):
- for the sake of speedz, Xmo's turn has basically been automated
- I've replaced NPCs with mechs to differentiate them from players
- players who do not have vision yet cannot leave the bar or do anything that involves the other structures
(yeah yeah I know it's bad design on my part)
- some plot advancing thangs are coming. Brace yourselves. Or don't, I don't really care

Jackie Milton: Despite your injuries, you release an onslaught of attacks against your drunken foe. Flinging
your fist outwards towards his face, it connects and knocks him over, leaving him sprawled out on his face.
Dodging your next kick, he gets up with surprising agility and almost roundhouse kicks you before you dodge
with a sudden burst of speed and strike him in the chest. He's knocked back, clearly dismayed by the way the
fight is going, and you follow up with a solid uppercut that finally knocks the tosser out. His body collapses onto
the floor.
The bartender, looking like he's seen this happen countless times, minds his own business. Nobody really
seems to notice or care about the fight. But hey, it's still a victory, your first victory in this strange land.

BountyFrog: You sneakily tread towards the maintenance guy while he's distracted, eyeing the pouch of
glasses. As your footsteps close in, he notices you out of the corner of his eye and is instantly surprised. You
quickly go for plan B and swing your fist wildly in an attempt to knock him out, smashing the back of his head
and sending him face-first into the grass. You grab a pair of glasses quickly without even glancing at them and
hightail your way away from him before he can get up to apprehend you.
You now have in your possession a pair of flamboyantly ugly glasses. (http://i.imgur.com/8qavwYQ.jpg) Trying
them on, you welcome your sense of clear vision return to you. The felt and sparkles are a bit itchy against
your skin and you definitely look like an idiot, but it's gotta be worth it, right?
VISION CURED -- MAP OPENED
With your eyesight back to its proper form, you see that this place has to be some sort of village, or town, or
settlement or something. Next to the bar is a supply shop, and next to that a bunkhouse or inn of some sort.
The whole place is surrounded by craggy rocks that appear to be belonging to mountains, giving you the
impression that this is some sort of mountain town. In one of the rocks you can see a trapdoor and a sign
written in a language you can't understand, with a weathered path leading up to it. Looking back at the path
leading away from the bar, you see a strange gate of magical energy barring your way out of the settlement...

DullPheonix and Xmo5: While you were attempting to haggle the price lower, BountyFrog comes by and gives
a visibly painful blow to the back of the maintenance worker's head, causing him to collapse face-first into the
grass with his pouch of glasses sticking out ready for the taking. The two of you, impulsed beyond control by
the sudden opportunity, each grab a pair of glasses quickly and take off before he gets back up.
DullPheonix receives a downright stupid-looking pair of reflector glasses (http://i.imgur.com/JRRcKzC.jpg).
Xmo5 receives a pretty dumb looking vision-correcting visor (http://i.imgur.com/fzUmywD.jpg).
The two of you decide to try your newly acquired treasures on.
VISION CURED -- MAP OPENED
With your eyesight back to its proper form, you see that this place has to be some sort of village, or town, or
settlement or something. Next to the bar is a supply shop, and next to that a bunkhouse or inn of some sort.
The whole place is surrounded by craggy rocks that appear to be belonging to mountains, giving you the
impression that this is some sort of mountain town. In one of the rocks you can see a trapdoor and a sign
written in a language you can't understand, with a weathered path leading up to it. Looking back at the path
leading away from the bar, you see a strange gate of magical energy barring your way out of the settlement...

Dreadnought: You make your way over to the bartender and ask where exactly you are.
"Bambo Village, pal. You must be one of the new arrivals..." he gulps, then continues, "between the murders,
the Lady and the constant barfights going down around here, you'd better keep an eye out if you want to
survive. The last bartender we had was sent into the dungeon by the Lady. And the one before him. Always on
the orders of retrieving some mystical artifact... none of them return." He pauses to shine a glass. "She's
coming back soon. I would pray to Wangfangdu that you don't get chosen..."
The majority of the stuff he's saying makes no sense, and he's pretty distressed even talking about it. What
exactly is going on here?

Just Look at My OPness: You admire the gun that your pal Death gave you, then change your shirt and take a
seat at the bar. You overhear the bartender talking to Dreadnought about some crazy stuff. Something about a
lady, and murders, and a dungeon, and Wangfangdu, whatever the hell that is -- you're pretty perplexed by it
all. When he's finished, he looks over to you as if waiting for you to order something. He's for some reason
unfazed at the fact you're holding two weapons in your hands.
BountyFrog (11/08/2015 10:38am):
LOL those are ugly glasses xD

I decide to then head over to the supply shop to see what kind of stuff they have.
DullPheonix (11/08/2015 02:21pm):
* recognize the glasses as mine (their ugliness is unmistakable)

* unequip the glasses and place them in my pocket
* bring the dazed handyman to the inn, figuring it is the best place to treat injuries
Just Look at My OPness (11/08/2015 02:32pm):
I look over at the bartender and ask "What's of interest in this area?"
Jackie Milton (11/08/2015 04:43pm):
I loot the aggressor's unconscious body, looking specifically for any sort of vision
enhancements. I also take his pants. and the contents of his pockets.
Xmo5 (11/08/2015 09:40pm):
(For the record, that was my legitimate move when Jackie said he was channeling me... I
was away :P)

I slip off as best I can without being noticed by the others to investigate the trapdoor and its
immediate surroundings. I hesitate when I arrive because I'm not certain I want to (try to)
enter it yet.
Dreadnought (11/08/2015 11:28pm):
Seeing as my vision is really blurry I ask the bartender if he knows of any place that
sells glasses or contacts in the area.
Bamboozle (11/09/2015 12:56am | Edited: 11/09/2015 01:00am):
BountyFrog: You head over to the supply shop, or what looks to be a supply shop judging from all the trinkets
and gear on display, and are greeted by the burly salesman. You gaze down at his selection of fine (and not so
fine) goods:
- swords, axes, bows, spears, halberds and more exciting varieties of weapons ranging from rusted-as-hell to
brand new
- chestplates, greaves, gauntlets, gloves, sabatons, coifs and all types of exquisite (and... terrible) pieces of
armor
- magical tomes, staves, wands and general relics and artifacts concerning the arcane end of things
- preserved, bagged and canned goods and foods for surviving long trips and journeys
You hear a sudden boom near the front of the town, where you arrived initially. A trumpeting horn blasts
through the air to alert the citizens, and, turning to look at it, you see the distant figure of an exotically-dressed
woman standing on a pedestal, surrounded by men and women wearing the same type of exotic fashion,
holding up a sheet of paper and apparently reading something off in a dignified manner. You'd have to get
closer to hear it all in quality, and something tells you this might be important, because a row of heavily-armed
soldiers stand near the woman touting their menacing-looking weapons.

DullPhoenix: You, for reasons unknown to this narrator, unequip your glasses and see the familiar haze of bad
vision return to you. You try to pick the handyman up, but he's far too heavy to lift all the way to the other side
of the bar, and besides, your vision issues would probably cause you to trip if you did try.
You hear a sudden boom near the front of the town where you arrived initially. A trumpeting horn blasts
through the air to alert the citizens, and, turning to look at it, you see... a blurry mess, because you aren't
wearing your glasses. You hear the voice of a woman shout through the air; you'd need to get closer to fully
understand what she's saying. Sounds awfully important.

Just Look at My OPness: You inquire as to what cool things go down around here. The bartender turns away
from Dreadnought, with whom he'd been previously talking, and opens his mouth, but is cut off by the sharp
blast of a trumpet that seems to be sourced down the path leading away from the bar. You look through the
open bar door to see the distant figure of an exotically-dressed woman standing on a pedestal, surrounded by
men and women wearing the same type of exotic fashion, holding up a sheet of paper and apparently reading
something off in a dignified manner. You'd have to get closer to hear it all in quality, and something tells you
this might be important, because a row of heavily-armed soldiers stand near the woman touting their
menacing-looking weapons.
"Go," the bartender breathes, "you don't want to miss this. You can't, actually. If you don't show up to the
Lady's speech, they'll send you down there regardless..."

Jackie Milton: You quickly take a few items of notice from your defeated opponent's body. You receive:
- a silver ring
- a lockpick
- 12 gc
- a pair of weird cardboard glasses (http://i.imgur.com/9biupFV.jpg)
- a pair of common pants
In your excitement at finally finding something to alleviate your crap vision, you try the glasses on. They don't
even have any material where the lenses should be, but somehow you feel your eyesight improve to normal.
Must be magic!
You hear a sudden boom near the front of the town, where you arrived initially. A trumpeting horn blasts
through the air to alert the citizens, and, turning to look at it through the bar door, you see the distant figure of
an exotically-dressed woman standing on a pedestal, surrounded by men and women wearing the same type
of exotic fashion, holding up a sheet of paper and apparently reading something off in a dignified manner.
You'd have to get closer to hear it all in quality, and something tells you this might be important, because a row
of heavily-armed soldiers stand near the woman touting their menacing-looking weapons.
DRUNKENNESS HAS WORN OFF
SCALP STILL INJURED

Xmo5: You shuffle away quietly from the others and approach the trapdoor. Looking at it, you notice it's much
older and much more dignified than you thought; wrought in a solid iron cast, with splashes of rust and dried
blood here and there, it sits humbly in a wall of stone, causing you to wonder what exactly lies behind it. It is
also very, very, VERY firmly locked; you can count at least ten sets of padlocks and about five sets of wooden
and metal bars binding it shut. You notice a sign near it, and you peer over to look at it. It's written in some
language or script you don't understand, though, and the only thing you recognize is the symbol of a skull near
the bottom.
You hear a sudden boom near the front of the town, where you arrived initially. A trumpeting horn blasts
through the air to alert the citizens, and, turning to look at it, you see the distant figure of an exotically-dressed
woman standing on a pedestal, surrounded by men and women wearing the same type of exotic fashion,
holding up a sheet of paper and apparently reading something off in a dignified manner. You'd have to get
closer to hear it all in quality, and something tells you this might be important, because a row of heavily-armed
soldiers stand near the woman touting their menacing-looking weapons.

Dreadnought: You ask the bartender what you gotta do to get a pair of glasses around here. He appears visibly
frustrated and tells you to either "follow the others" -- whatever that means -- or ask someone else. He then
starts to converse with Just Look at My OPness. Before you can do anything next, you hear a sudden boom
near the front of the town where you arrived initially. A trumpeting horn blasts through the air to alert the
citizens, and, turning to look at it, you see... a blurry mess, because you aren't wearing your glasses. You hear
the voice of a woman shout through the air; you'd need to get closer to fully understand what she's saying.
Sounds awfully important.
"Go," the bartender breathes, "you don't want to miss this. You can't, actually. If you don't show up to the
Lady's speech, they'll send you down there regardless..."
BountyFrog (11/09/2015 09:43am):
I turn around quickly to the shopkeeper, and ask who that is and if I should go listen.
Xmo5 (11/09/2015 11:29am | Edited: 11/09/2015 11:29am):
Having a bad feeling about the door and realizing that this thing by the bar looks
important (and possibly informative), I quickly head back towards the front of the town to
figure out what's going on. I certainly don't want to be caught snooping by anybody
holding a weapon like that!
Just Look at My OPness (11/09/2015 11:45am | Edited: 11/09/2015 09:38pm):
I quickly leave and go to hear the speech. As Dreadnought asks his question, I reply "It sounds like some sort of
speech is going down, seems important."
Dreadnought (11/09/2015 05:31pm):
I walk out with Just Look at MY OPness as he is my only visible point of reference and ask
him what the bartender means by follow the others.
DullPheonix (11/09/2015 09:40pm):
Perhaps there should be an "all" address?

* roll handyman flat on his back, at least
* put on glasses and attend announcement
Jackie Milton (11/09/2015 10:20pm):
While exiting the bar, I tear some of my shirt for a head bandage and hold it to my scalp.
I position myself by OP
Bamboozle (11/10/2015 01:52am | Edited: 11/10/2015 01:57am):
ALL PLAYERS: You make your ways toward the front of the village. You see the villagers gathering. Your
multitude of questions are only met with one answer.
"That," they whisper to you in hushed voices, "is the Lady Kipi Iteebaliboopibox Nabebombo Xinuv XVII. The
ruler of this village. It is time for the Sacrifice. We all must attend." Seems like a serious deal.
You trod behind the rest as you enter the strangely-adorned parade-like scene near the bar, where a pedestal
has been set up for the lady to talk. You hear words start to make sense, although the woman's ridiculously
thick accent is tough to decipher.
"Aell ceetizens moost ettend thees speech oor zey veell be-a execooted by my aermed gouerds. All here-a?
Guud. Reseedents ooff Bambo Villege-a, yuoo knoo zee strooggle ooff apeesing the ancient deity
Wungffungdu. Evfer seence-a his-a rise meellennia ago, ve hefe-a been furced tu send in a gruoop ooff
secreeffices eavery yeer intu hees-a doongeun tu saetisfie hees thurst fur hoomun bluud. I, as-a yuor feithffool
und joost rooler, hefe-a been furced tu continue-a thees tredishun. Wungffunddu has-a geefen me-a messege.
Heesa has deecided who ze sacreefooces vill be. Listen-a cloosely, alles. He wantsa ze ones who are vearing
ze funky glasses."
You feel the entire crowd look around and rest their gazes on you and the rest of the new arrivals who have
been forced to wear their newly-acquired glasses to see basic things. It seems your vision was removed by
someone or something for this purpose -- to designate you as a "sacrifice", however ominous that sounds. No
wonder you noticed nobody else was wearing glasses -- they had them on their persons to provide to you, but
they didn't need them. A perfect way to filter out the newcomers. It gradually begins to make sense... sort of.
The crazy lady begins talking again.
"Und for dose peopils who are not vearings ze glasses, yuo knowe who ruo are. Buy a piar of glasses frum ze
supplie shoppe, und don't-a be of tryings tu deceive usses! Zee secreeffices hefe-a oonly a foo muments tu
prepere-a zeemselfes. Zeey moost ventoore-a intu zee doongeun of Wungffungdu. Eet is ze bigge trapdoore
wit' de locks und all thate. Vhether zeey soorvive und meke-a it tu zee end und meet Wungffundu himsilf, oor
dey die a hoorible deeth, is up tu theer descreshun. My gooerds veell meke-a soore-a zeey fulloo zeese-a
here-a cummunds. Deesmissed!"
You honestly have no idea what the hell she's saying, but judging from the grim air of the village, it's definitely
not good for you guys. The guards swoop in and begin to shout things at you.
"Get-a your armor! Get-a your weapones! Does you vish to die on ze first stage of ze dungeon?" Then again,
the guards aren't making much sense either. Apparently you all need to buy supplies, armor, weapons and
other items of survival to help you survive in this "dungeon" -- whatever it is -- before the guards get impatient...
good thing there's a supply shop.

Adding on:

Dreadnought: You notice her quip about those who aren't wearing glasses and knowing who they are. You'd
best buy a pair from the supply store -- if you can make your way there without tripping.
DullPheonix (11/10/2015 03:31am):
Translation: All citizens must attend this speech or they will be executed by my armed
guards. All here? Good. Residents of Bambo Village, you know the struggle of appeasing the
ancient deity Wangfangdu. Ever since his rise millenia ago, we have been forced to send in
a group of sacrifices every year into this dungeon to satisfy his thirst for human blood.
I, as your faithful and just ruler, have been forced to continue this tradition.
Wangfangdu has given me a message. He has decided who the sacrifices will be. Listen
closely, all. He wants the ones who are wearing the funky glasses.

And for the peoples who are not wearing the glasses, you know who you are. Buy a pair of
glasses from the supply shop, and don't be trying to deceive us! The sacrifices have only
a few moments to prepare themselves. They must venture into the dungeon of Wangangdu. It
is the big trapdoor with the locks and all that. Whether they survive and make it to the
end and meet Wangfangdu himself, or they die a horrible death, is up to their discretion.
My guards will make sure they follow these here commands. Dismissed.

Get your armor! Get your weapons! Do you wish to die on the first stage of the dungeon?
DullPheonix (11/10/2015 03:34am):
* go to shop, determine what can be bought for 4g with no negotiating
Xmo5 (11/10/2015 08:22am):
Hurry to the shop and search for anything with a price of 3 gc or less.
Just Look at My OPness (11/10/2015 08:38am):
(I think you forgot that I also have no glasses since my vision is fixed). I head over to the shop, point my flintlock at the owner and demand some fake glasses.
Jackie Milton (11/10/2015 08:48am):
I run to the shop and bag OP with my spare pants to save the owner (and get a discount)
Just Look at My OPness (11/10/2015 08:48am | Edited: 11/10/2015 08:49am):

BountyFrog (11/10/2015 10:00am):
I run to the shop as well and while the shopkeeper is holed at gun point by Jackie I take the best
weapons and armor i can find.
Jackie Milton (11/10/2015 11:22am):
Dammit, OP is holding him up...
BountyFrog (11/10/2015 11:38am):
Oh...
BountyFrog (11/10/2015 11:40am):
Well while the shopkeeper is distracted with OP and his gun and Jackie now wrestling with him I use
that to my advantage to steal some good equipment :P
Xmo5 (11/10/2015 12:14pm):
OP is pretty OP right now, but Jackie don't care, nahhh. Jackie's not gonna let OP run
away with this one all by himself when he's got his own glory to hoard. OP gotta
flintlock? Well Jackie's got an extra pair of pants, so look out!

*ahem* ... As you were.
Dreadnought (11/10/2015 09:14pm):
I manage to get to the shop without tripping... more than 8 times, and see Jackie bagging
OP with a pair of pants but nevertheless ask the shell shocked store keeper if he has any
old glasses for sale.
Bamboozle (11/11/2015 12:51am | Edited: 11/11/2015 04:24pm):
ALL PLAYERS: You hurriedly make your way to the supply shop and begin to browse the selection of goods.
Some of you are more honest with your tactics in scoping out quality gear, while others deal with their issues
through the use of shiny force. The unwary shopkeeper, having just made it back from the speech, doesn't
have enough time to defend against the onslaught of people attempting to peacefully and non-peacefully mob
his store. A general bustle of commotion ensues, and in the end several things occur:
- Jackie Milton somehow ends up losing his pair of spare pants, AND his normal pair of pants, but receives the
shopkeeper's pair of pants, PLUS several more pant-like garments and armor
- Xmo5 tries to go the legal route and succeeds in buying some really cheap crappy gear
- DullPhoenix buys a few items and nicely pays the shopkeeper despite the commotion
- Just Look at My OPness gets a strange helmet-visor combo (http://i.imgur.com/r5iFZ5a.jpg) and manages to
grab a few more items before the shopkeeper gets to his senses
- BountyFrog steals some decent-looking gear at the price of being trampled underneath the others before
managing to escape
- Dreadnought tries to be polite and forthcoming to the shopkeeper and snags a few items of use before the
guards arrive to restore order

All in all, the lot of you get some interesting (and not-so-interesting) things:

DullPheonix has received a chainmail shirt and a wickedly spiked rusty iron mace (spent all money)
Xmo5 has received an iron spear, a rusted iron shield that's almost falling apart, and three packs of rations
(spent all money)
Just Look at My OPness has received a helmet-visor combo, a carton of eggs and a strange flask of purple
liquid (all stolen)
Jackie Milton has received a large and sweaty pair of cotton pants formerly belonging to the shopkeeper, a pair
of steel greaves and a floppy pink felt hat, but loses both of his pairs of common pants (spent 6 gc)
BountyFrog has received a set of dusty red robes, a steel handaxe, a pair of leather traveling boots and a bag
of dragon jerky (all stolen) at the cost of getting a bit injured
Dreadnought has received a pair of pointy glasses (http://i.imgur.com/5TL4dZT.jpg), a reinforced wooden
kiteshield, a composite bow and eight iron arrows (spent all money)

Soon after you begin to hear the shouts and yells of the guards as they approach.
"Geht yuor asses tu ze doongien dor! Qweekly, yuo fatte bastardes! Ve haven't of gottings alles day!" They,
seemingly paying no attention to the beleaguered shopkeeper, begin to stiffly point their spears at you and
prod you like cattle to the trapdoor. The Lady is waiting for you, eyeing you all with scorn.

"Est yuo alles here? Guud. I vill givings yuo onley a few muments to equipps yuor gear und orgunize
yuorselves fur yuor ixpedition-a in thes heres doongeon of Vuungfundu. Be of quickingnesse-a!" Apparently
she wants to you get your gear on and yourselves ready for the dungeon.

(Your next turn is purely to get ready. I have to make a new map for the dungeon anyways in the meantime so
yeah :P)
DullPheonix (11/11/2015 01:59am):
Does equipment stack or slot?
For example: chainmail atop shirt VS chainmail replacing shirt.
DullPheonix (11/11/2015 02:14am):
Oh, and did my character end up paying or not? There seems to be a conflict in the text.

Not that I expect to find a shop, vending machine, or other item dispensary in the dugeon.
Bamboozle (11/11/2015 02:30am | Edited: 11/11/2015 03:07am):
Yessir, see the end of your equipment list thing

> DullPheonix has received a chainmail shirt and a wickedly spiked rusty iron mace (spent all money)

Equipment can stack over normal clothing (so no piling chainmail shirts on top of each other, but you can wear
it over mundane clothes)
Xmo5 (11/11/2015 08:38am | Edited: 11/11/2015 08:39am):
I equip my iron spear and shield. I suggest to the other members that we coordinate and work
as a team. (OP is undead and has the most weaponry- he should go first! Also, does he
really need those eggs? Redistribution of wealth! :P)

I think DullPheonix was talking about this:

>DullPhoenix buys a few items but doesn't get the opportunity to pay due to the commotion
BountyFrog (11/11/2015 10:37am):
Rubbing my scabs I equip all of items I have received and I take a closer look at dragon jerky
wondering what it will taste like.
DullPheonix (11/11/2015 01:19pm | Edited: 11/11/2015 01:20pm):
It is unimportant other than for clarity; I specced my character as the good-natured
support type were it not apparent enough. They probably left the coins on the counter.

* equip chainmail shirt
* equip wickedly spiked rusty iron mace
Jackie Milton (11/11/2015 02:01pm):
On my way out, I grab the nearest weapon-like object (Which may or may not be Xmo5's pants)
Just Look at My OPness (11/11/2015 02:04pm):
I offer eggs to the group in exchange for the group's loyalty to me as their leader or face being capped.
Xmo5 (11/11/2015 03:02pm):
Awww man, am I gonna go into this dungeon pantsless? Why does that always happen to me?
Dreadnought (11/11/2015 03:22pm):
After I equip my bow and glasses, I look around for a lantern on the way to the trap door.
Bamboozle (11/11/2015 05:05pm | Edited: 11/11/2015 05:18pm):
(Oh yeah. I guess you do end up paying lel, I'll edit that)
(Jackie I'm changing you from YC to BD so that everyone faces the same way)
(Dungeon map is up. A key for the tiles you see, as well as a general guide of commands you can make in the
dungeon, are on there: http://awbw.amarriner.com/prevmaps.php?maps_id=67890

REPLY ON THAT MAP, NOT HERE -- IT'S A NEW EPISODE BABY)

DullPheonix: You wear your chainmail shirt over your common shirt and equip your mace.
Xmo5: You equip your crap-quality shield and your iron spear.
BountyFrog: You equip your robes over your common clothes, swap your shoes out for the leather traveling
boots, and equip your steel handaxe. You sniff the bag of dragon jerky. It smells awfully like
Jackie Milton: You're not able to get anything that resembles a weapon -- for now -- due to the stabby spears
of the guards preventing your group from infighting. You'll have to wait until the door opens. (see below)
Just Look at My OPness: You offer the carton of eggs to be shared amongst the group in exchange for their
loyalty to your cause. They don't seem to reply.
Dreadnought: Your equip your composite bow and the quiver of the small amount of arrows you have, as well
as your glasses.

ALL PLAYERS: As you finish up equipping your gear, the guards get to work unlocking the door. Padlock after
padlock falls as the heavy-duty keys are inserted, then the beams holding the door shut are torn off. The
burliest of the guards grabs the handle and strains to open the large slab of iron, but after a few attempts it
budges and falls open, knocking him ass-first flat onto the ground. As the other guards begin to shove your
group into the dungeon, Jackie Milton takes this opportunity to grab the guard's spear before he can get up
and react. As you rush through the door and feel your feet meet hard dungeon tiles, the door slams shut loudly
behind you and you hear the padlocks being relocked. All 16 of them. You're not getting out of here...
You look around and notice you're in a medium-sized chamber of stone brick construction, moldy walls
covered in lichen and algae welcoming you with their variety of dried bloodstains. The whole place seems
awfully musty and reeks of rat droppings, long-dead vermin and miscellaneous debris. You draw your eyes
towards the center of the room, where the interior is littered with dusty skeletons, but with no gear or supplies
in sight. What happened in this place?
Two light sources, torches on the walls on opposite sides of the room, provide some small semblance of light
and comfort. As your eyes follow their illuminating path, you suddenly notice a massive demonic idol
dominates one corner of the room. It appears to be roughly twenty feet tall and constructed of some obsidian-
like substance, its smiling face holding what appears to be two emeralds for eyes, a diamond for a nose and a
set of rubies for blood-red teeth. A fire crackles loudly in a crucible the statue holds in one of its hand,
mimicking a ball of fire roaring from its palm. The other hand is holding a sign, made out of the same purplish
substance, that says something in letters you cannot understand. This place is pretty metal.
An open door leads out from the center of the room. On one of the walls you can see a closed door, large and
made of imposing brass which reflects the torchlight. You wonder which path to take.
You hear a high-pitched screeching coming from somewhere else in the dungeon. Apparently, judging from the
loudness, not too far away.
Jackie Milton (11/11/2015 05:27pm):
"This place is pretty metal."
F' yeah!
\m/ >_< \m/

I examine the statue, looking specifically for any rare pants. During my search I attempt
to knock the gemstones off the statue with my spear.

*I also debate in my head whether the high-pitched screaming is leaning more toward a
shriek or a rasp...*
Xmo5 (11/11/2015 05:27pm | Edited: 11/11/2015 05:28pm):
I unequip my shield, grab a torch with my spare hand, and slowly approach and inspect the
idol. I try to see if I can remove and pocket the gems on its face, keeping my guard up
all the while.

Aww man, beat me by less than a minute! At least I have a torch :P
Jackie Milton (11/11/2015 05:28pm):
Hey, F*ck you
Bamboozle (11/11/2015 05:31pm):
Can youses copypaste your replies to the other thread, we're using that one for the
dungeon episode
Xmo5 (11/11/2015 05:35pm):
Yeah I just did that. Must have been an edit after I first read it :P
Jackie Milton (11/11/2015 05:36pm | Edited: 11/11/2015 05:44pm):
That ^


Nyvelion (08/01/2016 09:51am):
It is okay for me to look at this? I don't want to have too much out of character
information, but I need something to read when I have time to check AWBW, but when the
story hasn't been updated.
Bamboozle (08/06/2016 03:43am):
Ye, sure
Nyvelion (05/25/2018 09:30am):
Oops. I asked that, but then forgot to read this.
I just wanted to not use out of character information.



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